Not a peep was heard for over a minute.įearing that he'd hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. John, in desperation, threw up his hand, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even more rude. John tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to 'clean up' the bird's vocabulary.įinally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. The man replies, "Well, sir, it's kind of like a cross between a Bald Eagle and a California Condor."Ī young man named John received a parrot as a gift. The offender thanks the judge profusely and begins to walk away, when the judge asks, ?What does pelican taste like?" Don't EVER let me see you in my courtroom again.? But under such circumstances, I 'm letting you off with just a warning. The judge ponders this a moment, then says, "Well, the law says you should be in jail, or at least given a steep fine. To which the man replies "Well, Your Honor sir, I've been out of work for months, about to lose my home, and my family was hungry.? The judge, shaking his head says, "Son, what were you thinking? Surely you know that pelicans are a protected species!" The frog is a ventriloquist."Ī bird hunter appears in court for having shot a pelican. After the patron left, the bartender exclaimed, "I can't believe you let a singing hamster go for only $1,000!" The man considered it for a moment and then agreed to the deal. The patron paid the man and quickly left with the hamster. He offered the man $1,000 for the singing hamster. Just then another bar patron rushed up to the man. Even more impressed, the bartender gave the man a second drink. The frog started playing the saxophone again. So the man pulled a hamster out of his pocket and set it on the bar. The man then asked for another drink in exchange for something even more amazing. The bartender agreed. The frog then proceeded to play an incredible jazz solo. Highly impressed, the bartender gave the man a drink. The man reached into his pocket and pulled out a frog and a tiny saxophone. However, he would show the bartender something amazing in exchange for a drink. It was a slow day, so the bartender agreed. He told the bartender that he didn't have any money.
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